COFFEE.  I needed a VENTI hot latte with an extra shot of espresso and a dash of cinnamon. Something to relax my nerves and warm my soul. 

Naturally, I called Matt (my husband) to make my request known on his drive home from work. He refers to a Starbucks run as a “state of emergency.” Mom needs coffee, stat!  A coffee run mid-day usually lets my husband know the kind of day I am having so “state of emergency” is an accurate description.

Anticipating that first sip, I pace the kitchen waiting for his arrival.

The list of “to-do’s” continues to grow in my head when he walks thru the door.  Coffee! Ahh, now it’s time to regroup and breathe. 

 Enjoying my first sip, my oldest son, still living at home, says,

 “ Good job, dad! Happy wife, happy life.  She was grumpy!”

 I shot him a look from across the kitchen, but Matt quickly replies

 “happy spouse happy house.” I looked at him puzzled when he continued to explain to our son.

“ I love your mom and enjoy making her happy.  But she does the same for me.  It’s not about one person being happy.  It’s about taking care of each other”

Ethan nodded at his father and walked away. I took the opportunity to jump into his arms giving him the biggest hug.  Matt is a man of little words. But when he has something to say, he says it.  

I had never thought of that before. We often hear “ Happy wife happy life” but Matt was correct.   Marriage is not about what the other person is giving you but about what you bring to each other.  

What he is saying when he walks through the door from a long day with a cup of coffee in hand is: 

“Thank you for all you do to take care of me, our home, and our children. I love you.”

What I am saying when I have his lunches packed, dinner made, laundry is done, and or get up early to have breakfast with just him is:

 “thank you for working so hard outside the home to provide for us. I love you.” 

Happy Spouse Happy House means putting my husband’s desires before my own, and out of love, he does the same for me. Love is an action.  A happy spouse equals a happy house.